The truth about Imran Tahir

The truth about Tahir

He fractured his thumb in the nets? That's what you think

NAGPUR - A thumb-wrestling match between Johan Botha and Imran Tahir turned violent here on Wednesday when the no-longer-future captain of South Africa fractured the thumb of the first Protea who has ever been able to spin a ball.

The two players were having lunch at the hotel where they are staying when Botha challenged Tahir to an apparently friendly duel, but things turned sour when Botha turned Tahir's thumb a bit too much and it resulted in a fracture.

"I mean, we thumb-wrestle in the team all the time. It's how we decide on things like who is going to open the bowling. So I didn't think much of it when Botha asked me to play," Tahir said.

Paul Harris

According to reports, Tahir playfully asked Botha whether he was worried about his place in the side. "I was just kidding. I didn't think he would take it so seriously, but he started pushing my thumb really, really hard and then I heard a crack and I had to be rushed to the medical staff."

Botha denied that his actions were out of jealously or panic that he could lose his side in the squad.

"I'm not worried about my place in the team. Tahir was brought to India to be our secret weapon. A secret weapon is only a secret weapon as long as nobody knows about it. Everybody knows about Tahir now. There are just a few sides left that need to play him and figure him out," Botha said.

"It's only a matter of time before everybody has figured him out. Then I can go back to baking pies and order will be restored to the South African line-up. We'll be without a useful spinner once again. So no panic or any malicious intent from my side at all."

According to reports, Kamran Akmal was the referee for the thumb-wrestling match and things got out of hand when he dropped the whistle before he could call a halt to proceedings as things began to turn messy. Akmal denied allegations that Botha paid him to drop the whistle.

Proteas staff, however, moved quickly to cover up the mess, stating the injury was inflicted when Tahir caught-and-bowled Jonathan Trott in Chennai on the weekend. Graeme Smith immediately blamed the pitch.

"Well, as you know, the pitch in Chennai was quite dreadful. It's also the reason we lost the game. We knew we could expect a pitch to aid spin, I predicted on Twitter that we'd see pitches aiding India for the rest of the tournament, but I didn't expect the pitch to be so bad that it damages our players," said Smith.

There's no news yet as to who will replace Tahir, should he be injured for the long term, but it probably won't be Botha. There is some speculation that another foreigner might be drafted into the squad since quality spinners in South Africa are as rare as Akmal actually holding on to anything.

Paul Harris could be an option for the Proteas, as he has apparently been turning in his sleep quite often and was even promoted to tong master at a friend's barbecue.

The biggest confusion is currently around what Tahir would actually need his left hand for. Tahir bowls with his right hand. Speculation is that he needs both hands to constantly alter his already ridiculous hair.

Ant Sims is a South African who usually writes about personal finance and blogs here. Follow her on Twitter here. The quotes and "facts" in this piece are all made up, but you knew that, didn't you?